Stretching Credulity

In light of recent events I can’t talk about, I have developed my already keenly honed worrying skills to a fine art form.  I now present: Angsta Yoga

Fidgetasana: Pace around, not remembering what you were going to do in the kitchen anyway.  Remember.  Go in there.  Do something else instead.  Repeat for all rooms of the house when you can’t keep still.

Whatnewsasana: Stretch for the phone whenever it rings, taking a deep, fortifying breath.

Nostalgiasana: Reach for old familiar movies over and over again.

Avatarasana: Sign up for a Second Life account.  Spend some time giving new hairdos to an imaginary person with an improbable name.

Voodooasana: Set great store in any sort of omen that could be, even at its most tangential, related to the event which is causing your yoga practice.  Couple this with Nostalgiasana above by watching grim movies to purge negative karma, and you can go from “omens” to The Omen in one simple step.

Craftasana: Take out all those craft projects you’ve been meaning to finish.  Work on them for about half an hour, until Fidgetasana starts again.

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